A Conversation in April

When I meet new people and tell them what I am doing on the Delta, there is a pretty consistent assumption that I am in Teach For America. Teach for America (TFA) is a much larger, much more well known alternate-route teaching program that serves critical need areas all over the country. Due to the similarities of the missions, there are a copious amount of TFA'ers on the Mississippi Delta (roughly 540) and the issues faced by any TFA teacher here easily mirror those of the Teacher Corps. When reading articles like this one and this one, I can only nod my head as I am reminded of critiques and war stories of my own.

I remember a conversation over dinner the April before I started the program. I was living in a big city, with a much more lucrative and attractive job, and had been making plans to make the transition to the Delta. In the conversation, my friend asked me: "What are you most excited about?", to which I paused, pondered for a second, and responded, "you know, I'm just really excited about working my butt off, I know it's going to be a challenge, but that's what I'm most looking forward to". For whatever reason, this conversation has lingered with me through the past eight months and likely will continue to. Not for the ignorance of my answer, but for the life lesson that has come from it.

It is easy to talk about training for a marathon. You can research training plans, make fantastic carb heavy meals, and even go buy a pair of new shoes. At some point though, you actually have to start running. All the talking of training and intentions won't actually bring you to the finish line, only your legs will. Herein lies the lesson, as it has been my experience with Teacher Corps as well. It is one thing to say, "yeah I hear this is the most difficult thing I'll ever have to do", and a completely different thing to rise at 4:30 am in October, exhausted and defeated, and realize it is only Tuesday and you have to continue on for four more days and seven more months.

A certain element of teaching here requires planning, a certain element involves realistic expectation, and a lot of it mandates grit. I don't say this to glorify myself and my meager accomplishments here, but because the expectations of the experience should be realistic. All too often, I imagine aspiring teachers read or hear the accounts of the alternate route, and imagine themselves to be the exception. "Oh well it's terrible that they had to deal with that, but I surely won't have to", they think, or "well it sounds like they had a very difficult time, but they probably didn't do much in college to prepare them". To all these thoughts, I would humbly say, "I hope you're right". Yes, I poured a lot of time into studying while in college. Yes, I was heavily involved in several extra-curricular activities while enrolled. Yes I worked. These are all things that caused strain and stress in my life, but again, the comparison is not there.

The difficulty comes, though, when one hears accurate testimonies, and discounts them to subjective self-pity. Any random aspiring teacher can hear that they will likely face the challenge of their life, but to say this and to do it are two very different challenges.