I have a student; let's just call him Bobby. Bobby started coming to school about a week after classes started, and was initially very quiet. His head was down a lot, he didn't really speak to anyone, he just kept to himself. About a week into his tenure, I had a fight in my room. As I was breaking it up, I looked to my right and to my surprise, saw Bobby helping diffuse the situation. This act stuck with me, and I sent a note home the day after to tell his parent or guardian about Bobby's heroic actions. It takes a lot for a kid to step into a fight like that, and I thought they should know about it as well.
Unfortunately, it would only take a few more days before Bobby became somewhat ornery. I guess he started feeling a bit more comfortable and decided to push the boundaries a little. He began to disrupt class more and more by getting out of his seat or talking out. When he received consequences for his actions, he regularly argued. Bobby was becoming a growing pain.
One day he decided he wanted to go out for football. Another coach encouraged him to try it out, and a few days later, Bobby was on the field. It was great to have him out, not only because he was clearly an athlete, but because it helped with his behavior in my class. His attitude drastically improved. He smiled at me more, looked me in the eye, and was generally more pleasant to be around. In hearing more about his story from other coaches, it turns out Bobby had drastically improved from last year. Unfortunately he had spent time in and out of alternative school before this, and even in his orneriest of moods, was merely a shadow of what he once was.
One day, Bobby came to me in class and asked me if I would deliver his cleats to the head coach. "I'm through with this, man. I'm tired of the way I'm gettin' treated", he said. "How are you being treated, Bobby?" I replied, and he began explaining. Thus launched a 35 minute dialogue between he and I about why he shouldn't quit. It was truly one of those talks you see in the movies. You know, they usually go something like: player comes to coach, insisting he wants to quit. Coach talks to him about his concerns, and delivers a rousing and motivational word on why quitting can't happen, and that if he quits here, he'll regret it, and be a quitter the rest of his life. Player understands, does some hard thinking, and comes back and leads his team to the championship. I'm telling you it was textbook. Straight out of Mighty Ducks VIII: Mid-life Crisis. He understood, was encouraged, and was on the field that day. I felt it a small victory at least. Any time you can turn the attitude of a potential quitter, I think it at least deserves a pat on the back.
Things continued to sail smoothly, and Bobby's face was regularly seen in both class and practice. I had reached a student, and appealed to his inner spirit enough to stick with school and football; happy ending right? Wrong.
Bobby was caught buying pot in the bathroom last week. State Mandated Expulsion.
A sad story, no doubt about it. Pray for Bobby, he is in a difficult place.
If one hangs around a school long enough, I'm convinced even the hardest of hearts will grow near the students. It is difficult, though, because people are messy. Our brokenness is part of our humanity, but it will ultimately take its toll on us, and on those around us. Life happens, and it helps us understand God a bit more, but the cost of this understanding is not always the sweet part of the rose.
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