At the beginning of the school year, all is well. You can develop theories about which classes are going to be challenging, but you won't really know the true personality of each student and each class for another couple of weeks. We are now in week 12. The honeymoon is over, and each class has developed a personality of its own.
For example, I have 1st period Trig. This class is full of seniors. Many of the seniors here have an overgrown sense of entitlement and a raging case of senioritus, and it is displayed by their punctuality. I regularly start this class with 7-10 students, and end it with 20. They just trickle in, laxidasical and free.
Contrast that with my 5th period Geometry class. This class is sleepy, very sleepy. It is probably a combination of apathy and the post-lunch induced food coma they suffer. 5th period is led by Sleepy Silento. Sleepy Silento literally puts his head down every day. Every day. I don't know if it is a medically documented issue, but somehow he is rarely asleep. When I call on him, he simply picks his head up, answers the question (always correctly), then returns it to the synthetic pressboard desk. You would never think Silento was paying attention, but he pulls it off and has a low B average. I only wonder what the kid would be capable of if he applied himself. Quantum Physics? Answering the problem of Evil? Who knows, I just wish he would share his brain with more than just his desk.
Unfortunately it is not always so easy to find humor in the personality of a class. Some classes are just plain mean. I have one geometry class that fits this description. This class is far and away the most unruly and ornery of the classes. Many students show up late, talk during instruction, then get angry when they are not understanding what is going on. I had to put 4 of the students from this class out on Tuesday. That is roughly 1/5 of the class (depending on the day). Obviously there are already challenges each of these students face, but the most frustrating thing about this class, is it seems so many of their frustrations are self induced. In my mind I think, "If you're not comprehending what is going on in class, maybe you could help yourself by paying attention and not talking to the girl behind you." This makes way too much sense though, and I'm finding more and more, that things that tend to make sense rarely occur down here. I literally had a student say in class yesterday, "man, I need a new math teacher". This is the same student who has skipped my class twice this week. You tell me, Porsha, who is hurting who here?
In signing up to teach in a critical needs environment, you have to know that classes like this will exist. It is just the nature of the environment. It is difficult, though, because no matter how unruly and unacceptable a student's behavior, you still want them to learn. Furthermore, if they're not learning, you can't help but feel that in some way you are failing them. This problem plagues my thoughts at times, and reminds me of how far I still have to go. Teaching truly is a discipline that is honed and developed over time. Effective instruction does not happen over night, and the learning curve is at times painful. I have hope though, and know that progress is being seen, because at least Sleepy Silento is getting it.
Album of the week: Trouble by Ray LaMontagne. A good choice if you need to be put at ease, just disregard the overtones of drug use and depression. Invest and enjoy.
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